Squishy in all the wrong places, it's...
T H E J U I C E A N D G I N
Thursday, September 28, 2006
Term XLII, Issue 03 (#212)
Weather outlook:
Up to your sweet cheeks in rain.
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* Contents *
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- Editor's Blurb
- Ongoing Events
- Greg's DTK
- Humour
- General Info
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* Editor's Blurb *
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Hey all
(All of the content in this week's edition of the Juice and Gin has been
made possible through generous donations by people like you. And Linda
G. And Alejandro. And that angry Greg guy.)
I know this is late notice, but September 19th is (er, was) Talk Like A
Pirate Day! You can't make stuff like thus up:
http://www.talklikeapirate.com/
Mark your calendars and make sure you celebrate this festive holiday
with your family each and every year hereafter. If you don't, parrots
will peck your eyes out.
Avast ye scurvy bilge rats! Yarrr!
See how easy that is?
And while you're practising talking like a pirate, you might as well
take the Pirate Quiz. http://www.piratequiz.com/ It even generates
your own pirate name!
Only cool kids have pirate names. Maybe it will have "Captain" in it.
Only if you're lucky, Chesterino.
Until next time,
You have to run with the rabbits.
Michael (mailto:nutsinfo$yahoo.ca)
And now, the rest of the story...
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* Ongoing Events *
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[See the Event Calendar on the web site for full descriptions.
--Ed.]
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Pool League
===========
Mondays
http://nutsevents.topcities.com/events/index.html#Monday
Contact: Dave and Michael (pool$solutionsatsource.com)
View the current players' statistics at:
http://nutsevents.topcities.com/events/pool/index.html
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Indoor Rock Climbing
====================
Thursdays
Contact: Andrew (akpallek$hotmail.com)
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* Greg's Deep Thought Korner *
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Maher Arar.
Indeed.
So the whole sordid affair is out where everyone can see it easily.
Maher Arar: Canadian citizen; deported to Syria by the United States;
tortured in Syria until he confessed to crimes he couldn't actually have
committed. If you have any doubt of the details, you can check them
pretty much anywhere you like nowadays.
Then there was the enquiry which confirmed that the RCMP and CSIS, our
own security organizations, provided the Americans with the information
that led them to think Maher Arar was somehow associated with terrorism.
The enquiry condemned the actions of those two organizations.
Our media appear to be doing something quite similar -- the condemning
part, that is -- but they're missing the point.
The first thing I see on the news is the bit about the RCMP handing
"evidence" over to American officials. The problem, apparently, is that
the evidence is circumstantial. The RCMP, you see, had bad info on
Arar. The American officials in question took this bad info to heart
and sent Arar packing off to Syria. The next information we had was a
report to CSIS that Maher Arar had confessed to being a terrorist.
CSIS, for some reason that mystified even the enquiry, decided to accept
this confession at face value despite Syria's record of human rights
abuses and torture.
The crime, as portrayed by the media, was that Arar was tortured because
of circumstantial evidence. The crime, as portrayed by the two reports
I just saw on television, was that CSIS believed the report of
confession and therefore led the Canadian government to protest less
than it should have.
The crime, apparently, was that Maher Arar was the wrong guy to torture.
I would like to submit, for your analysis, the idea that -- perhaps --
the people who bring us our news have lost their damned minds.
The crime was torture. Whether or not Maher Arar was a criminal;
whether or not he attended a camp in Pakistan; whether or not he spoke
to Al Qaeda members; whether or not he's even a murderer - none of these
things are relevant to the fact that we as a nation acquiesced to his
torture.
If you want to be pragmatic about it, you can make a lot of technical
points about torture. For one thing, it doesn't work. While torture
does illicit confessions from criminals, it elicits confessions from the
innocent as well. (Google me this: "witch hunt" "salem".) While
torture can get information from terrorists, it also gets completely
useless, falsified information from non-terrorists who are just hoping
that you'll stop it with the broomstick already if they pretend they
know something.
So torture doesn't work? That's the reason we shouldn't do it?
No. The reason we don't torture is because it's a cruel, inhuman thing
to do. I'm well aware that we are bound to come across cruel, inhuman
people who do horrible things. These people will knock over World Trade
Centers, spread depleted uranium all over Iraq, cluster bombs all around
southern Lebanon or blow themselves up in a crowded plaza.
The question arises: Do these people deserve to be tortured?
The answer is a very firm "maybe." But it's the wrong question.
The question is: should we torture these people? The emphasis is on
the "we". "We" must understand that undertaking to enact cruel
punishment on other human beings isn't just bad for them, it's also bad
for us. I can't pretend to have any magical power that allows me to
decide what other human beings "deserve". Tolkien observed in the Lord
of the Rings that "many die who deserve to live while many who live
deserve to die". Fair enough, though I have no idea who is really
entitled to make such decisions. When "we" decide to torture people, we
have surrendered the moral high ground that was supposed to separate
"we" from "they."
"We" don't have an infinite fountain of benevolence from which we can
draw the right to torture people based on our generally friendly
disposition.
Torture is an evil thing to do, even when it's done to an evil person.
There is nothing we could gain from torture that could possibly be worth
what we lose by doing it...
...even if it did work.
Greg.
[Send responses to DTKs or new Editorials to nutsinfo$yahoo.ca]
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* Humour *
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[Forward any good jokes or interesting web sites you see to
nutsinfo$yahoo.ca]
[Disclaimer: The Humour Section may contain content that includes dirty
words, adult situations and jokes that make fun of politicians. Viewer
discretion is advised. --Ed.]
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Komaneko
========
Stop Motion Cat makes Stop Motion Movie. Dialogue-free Japanese short
so cute it will make you feel dirty.
http://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=KOMANEKO
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Men Are like
============
Thanks to Linda G.'s Gender-Specific Comedy Stump
1. Men are like Laxatives...
They irritate the crap out of you.
2. Men are like Bananas...
The older they get, the less firm they are.
3. Men are like Weather...
Nothing can be done to change them.
4. Men are like Blenders...
You need one, but you're not quite sure why.
5. Men are like Chocolate Bars...
Sweet, smooth and they usually head right for your hips.
6. Men are like Commercials...
You can't believe a word they say.
7. Men are like Department Stores...
Their clothes are always 1/2 off.
8. Men are like Government Bonds...
They take soooooooo long to mature.
9. Men are like Mascara...
They usually run at the first sign of emotion.
10. Men are like Popcorn...
They satisfy you, but only for a little while.
11. Men are like Snowstorms...
You never know when they're coming, how many inches you'll get or
how long it will last.
12. Men are like Lava Lamps...
Fun to look at, but not very bright.
13. Men are like Parking Spots...
All the good ones are taken and the rest are handicapped.
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* General Info *
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Contact the NUTS Committee:
nutsinfo$yahoo.ca
The NUTS Website is:
http://nutsevents.topcities.com/
http://torpedo.ca.newbridge.com/mirror/ (for people within Alcatel)
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